“I hope you find what you’re looking for.’
When I started telling people I was planning to quit my job and move to New Zealand, just about everyone reacted one of two ways.
The most common one among my close friends and family was “You’re so brave!” Now, while I don’t feel particularly courageous, I can understand the sentiment; I’m doing something a lot of people only dream about. And yeah, leaving the comfort of everything you know isn’t exactly easy, especially if you’re doing it hrough tears.
But boy, the other one. The other one got under my skin.
“I hope you find what you’re looking for.”
Um. What?
Why is it that when we do something out of the ordinary, people assume we are doing it because something is wrong with us? That we are searching to fill something that’s missing?
Last I checked, I was a whole person. And from someone who spent years in depression and anxiety, I can tell you that I couldn’t take this leap if I didn’t finally feel complete on my own.
And before anyone says it, I know part of this is the recent rise in books like “Eat, Pray, Love” and “Wild” that feature female protagonists who go into the unknown to heal. But it still feels somewhat condescending to me, as if I’m less of a person because I don’t want a house, a husband and 2.5 kids at 30. (Trust me, I tried to want that life and failed miserably.)
Bottom line: I’m not searching for anything, I’m just finally risking everything for my dream, and I guess that makes me brave.
Sorry to have to be the one to tell you this. You are most definitely looking for something. It’s called adventure.
And it’s awesome. You’re going to love it.
I never thought of that! But you make a rather good point, adventure is definitely something I am looking for. Maybe I should rewrite this post or do an update in the future. 🙂
not even for satisfaction and happiness through what you love doing?
I mean, I think that goes without saying, haha. But you’re right, I am looking for that. 🙂