“Fill your life with adventures, not things. Have stories to tell, not stuff to show.’ -Unknown
Learning not to be a pack rat is hard when you grew up with a mom who kept literally everything.
You see, when you’re poor you have this mindset that everything is important because you don’t know what you’ll be able to afford in the future. This means you don’t give or throw away much; everything is kept around “just in case.”
My childhood home is full of so many things because of this mindset. There are boxes of my school papers that I will likely never look at again, my mom has more clothes than she could wear in a year, and none of this counts what’s in our family’s detached garage.
Naturally, as much as I recognized this was a problem, I kept some of these tendencies when I moved out. I had boxes and boxes of mementos from past boyfriends, old phones, VHS tapes and even a broken music player. I can’t tell you why I kept these things, I just did.
What helped me start sorting through this was a book called “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” by Marie Kando.
(Yes, the same book Emily Gilmore references in “Gilmore Girls: Year in the Life.” Now why the book didn’t work for her, it did work for me.
The KonMarie Method is very particular and I suggest reading the whole book if its something you want to do right. The method splits your items and stuff into categories which you then go through in a certain order, moving from easy to hard.
The method to go through your things in each category is the same: you hold each item in your hands and see if it brings you joy. If it does, you get to keep it, if it doesn’t, you have to get rid of it. I admit this sounds a little weird and obviously takes some practice, but the results are pretty epic. I went through a closet overflowing with clothes to just 3 suitcases (and a couple of boxes I shipped home.)
Now, I won’t say this is easy. There are some things that made me cry when I went through them, especially when it came to my boyfriend boxes. But it’s kind of freeing in a way to only have 3 suitcases, and frankly, I want to get down to another one.
Letting go of a lot of incredible nerd memorabilia and books wasn’t as hard as parting with my furniture which came as a bit of a surprise.
I think this was because I had bought the furniture new only a year ago and thought it would follow me to my eventual home. However, I think buying it helped me feel “tied down” to an area, and ultimately gave me the motivation and strength to move. I like being able to just pack up and go somewhere new if I want to, and owning big bulky items doesn’t let you do that.
It’s only been a few weeks so I have to admit I still miss some of my “things,” (especially my bed and central heat.) But if I had those things still I couldn’t have made this trip, and I wouldn’t have any of the great memories I have already made in this new country.
